For Want of a Boot
- Trapper: Besides, Klinger's not a pervert.
- Margaret: How do you know that?
- Trapper: Because I'm one and he's never at the meetings.
The Incubator
- [the morning after a wild party]
- Hawkeye: (quietly) Trapper? Trapper?
- Trapper: I'm not gonna talk unless you stop screaming.
The Trial of Henry Blake
- [Hawkeye and Trapper are playing ping-pong]
- Frank: Are those gurney tables?
- Hawkeye: Right.
- Frank: And those are surgical masks. You're playing ping-pong!
- Trapper: I told you it was ping-pong!
Divided We Stand
- Frank: What is that?
- Trapper: What is that what, Frank?
- Frank: Why is someone's appendix in this boot?
- Hawkeye: Because the other one is full of tonsils.
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